Hawk the Slayer (RiffTrax Preview) http://www.rifftrax.com/hawk-the-slayer

If you took a Dungeons & Dragons adventure written hastily by an 8th grader during study hall and turned it into a movie, you’d wind up with something a lot like Hawk the Slayer. In fact, we wouldn’t be surprised if that’s how they actually got the script. But this movie has something that no D&D adventure can claim: Jack Palance. A whole lot of Jack Palance. Specifically MEGA-EVIL Jack Palance, playing a character named Voltan. He yells, kills, yells, whisper-threatens, whisper-yells, kills, and mostly just yells his way across the countryside. Seems no one can stop him until his brother Hawk - yes, his brother, despite being about 40 years younger - gathers an elf, a dwarf, and a giant to take him down. Not as much dignity as a Fellowship of the Ring, more of a… Crew of the Stuff.

Keen-eyed fans may recognize the dwarf from our release Prisoners of the Lost Universe. Also, the actor playing Hawk went on to portray Jack’s dad in Lost — hmmm, Prisoners of the LOST Universe, LOST, time to dig up your old Lost conspiracy theories because there’s something happening here, IT’S ALL CONNECTED.

Join Mike, Kevin and Bill for a heaping helping of Jack the Palance and Hawk the Slayer!



Childish Gambino is one of the most clever rappers in hip-hop — and these 19 lyrics prove it

 With the most hilarious and cutting referential lyrics in the game, he’s won over some pretty heavy hitters in hip-hop, including ScHoolboy Q, Funkmaster Flex and Gangsta Grillz, who produced and released Gambino’s latest mixtape STN MTN, which has already been certified gold on DatPiff. Here are the lines that prove he’s the quickest man in the game.

"More green than my Whole Foods and I’m too fly, Jeff Goldblum"Follow micdotcom